Funny sms

I know why I am single, my parents-in-law were not able to have kids...

I am not your type ... I am not inflatable.

I like to compare you with a nice cold glass of beer, beautiful colour, perfect taste, really perfect and when the glass is empty i just take the next one!

I once sniffed Coke, but the icecubes blocked my nostrils...

Jesus says to John come forth ill give you eternal life. John came fifth he won a toaster

A girl phoned me the other day and said..."Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home

At dis moment in time 10 million people r having sex.5 million people r drinking coffee.100 million people r sleeping & 1 stupid fool is reading my text!pass on

The rain makes all things beautiful.The grass & flowers 2. If rain makes all things beautiful why doesn’t it rain on you?

i want u 2 know dat our friendship means alot 2 me.U cry i cry.U lauf i lauf.U jump out of da window... I look down & den... i lauf again

20% of the population is now drinking coffee, 60% is having sex, 19% is watching television and one yokel is now holding his mobile in his hand

A woman likes to have four animals in the house: a jaguar in front of the doorway, a fox in the closet, a bull in bed, and a numbskulll to pay for this all.

Are these your eyes, I found them between my brests!

Be friendly with your kids, they choose your home when you are old!

Be nice to the ones who smoke.. every cigarette migh be their last.

BEEB! Send this message to 5 of your friends and you will have unbelievable sex tonight! If you break this chain, you'll never have multiple orgasms again!